So here we are; we’re finally at the end of this month long celebration of women in my life. We started with the most important woman in my life – the Wife, and what would be more fitting that to close it out with someone who is the future of Women’s History, Baby Skully.
Earlier this week I was telling the Wife who was going to be featured in my last few posts in this project. She was obviously happy I was going to be talking about her best friend, concerned I was going to be talking about my mom, but over the moon excited I was going to write about Baby Skully. That’s when I realized, that in the just over 8 months she’s been with us, this will be the first time I have written a post featuring her. I wondered why that was, other than I have been lazy about posting in 2017. Was I scared or nervous to talk about her? Did I not feel connected to her enough to invest in a post? Or is she just boring and there isn’t much to write about an 8 month old? Well, who cares, because we’re here now. Read more →
I bet you didn’t expect this curve ball coming, did you? If you’ve been here for any amount of time, you’ve read about my abusive past with my mother, and if not, you might want to hit up the archives.
I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and evaluating of my life recently. I don’t know, maybe it’s because every day it feels like 40 is getting closer and closer (because it literally is dummy, that’s how days work. Ugh, this guy). One of the major things I’ve landed on, even though I’m still trying to reconcile it in my mind, is that two things that are opposite of each other can still coexist in the world of truth. And this is causing havoc as I try to relate it to my past. Did that make any sense? Ok, here’s an example: you can love someone but not like them. Or in my case, you can not love someone at all, or even like them, but you can admire them? Read more →
Maybe it’s my cynical nature, or maybe I’ve become too hardened over the years, but the more I look at the generation behind me, and the one following them, it feels like something is missing. Well, a lot of things to be honest, but none more than the ability to value others above yourself, or to put it plainly – friendship.
I feel like my generation is the last that will truly know what it means to be friends with someone; real friends, not just the kind of friends social media has created. We’re the last generation who can truly say we were raised pre and post internet, when you actually had to invest in building relationships. I know, this is sounding like I’m just seconds away from screaming, “Get off my lawn”, and I’m sorry for that. But this is the one thing I can’t seem to reconcile about the younger generation these days, especially when I look at some of the people in my life and see what a true friend looks like. It saddens me to thinkthey’ll never really know that feeling. Read more →
When friends without children ask to describe what it’s like having kids (why you would ever ask this, I have no idea), I tell them, “Raising kids is very much like listening to the music on the radio today; it sucks!” Ok, it doesn’t just suck. Sometimes it can be fun, and who knows, after a while you might even grow to like it. Oh, and it’s really fun when you can make fun of it. Of course I’m talking about the music; the kids still suck.
If you spend even one minute on social media; and let’s face it, if you’re a red blooded human being, you’re on there most of your day like everyone else, you’ve seen at least one video doing a parody of a song you know. And most likely, it’s parents doing it – moms to be more specific. Read more →
Poetry is one of the aspect of the literary/writing world that I have never gotten the hang of. Shit, let’s be honest, I barely have a handle on writing as it is. But, during my time spent in the blogging world, I have met some writers that create some of the most beautiful poetry. So good that I would rather hear than recite a poem that just came up with, than a blog post they have been stewing on or a while. And that’s in no way a knock on their writing; their poetry is just that good.
Maybe my lack of poetic understanding is why life has always seemed so unfair to me. They say life is poetic, and I guess if I understood that more, or how to tap into that world I wouldn’t have such a harsh outlook on life. But then…then I think about some of the people I’ve become acquainted with over the last few years. The kind of people that you hear about the roller coaster that is their life; the struggles they’ve have lived, and then listen to their outlook on life, and you might find yourself thinking, This person is crazy! But, wasn’t the same said about many of the greats? Read more →
One of the major pitfalls of getting married and having kids is the increased chances of losing ourselves; our individuality; what makes us unique. The struggle to reclaim that identity, or even the scary realization that you may have not had one to begin with, can be enough to drive a wedge in a marriage, or keep someone in a relationship when they are unhappy. But what if that relationship ends, and you now find yourself with no idea where to go next.
In the past, and maybe even now to a degree, it feels as if women are facing this more than men. While the number of stay at home dad is on the rise, as is traditional households where the woman is the primary source of income, it still seems like society looks at women as losing their identity within the family construct. Even if the woman is the primary bread winner, much of society will refer to Jane as Joe’s wife, instead of referring to them as equals. This kind of societal patriarchy can cause huge identity issues when a long-term relationships ends. Read more →
I bet it was really lonely being creative a long time ago. Very rarely do you ever read about groups of great creative minds hanging out with one another, sharing ideas, critiquing each other’s work, or generally being a support system for one another. And as far as teaching their tips and tricks to younger creators to hone their skills – forget about it. In fact, most creators that we read about from years past seem to be lonely, angry, and kind of all curmudgeonly and shit. Hell, half these mofos died alone, or spent their free time hacking off body parts for no good reason…I’m looking at you Van Gogh, you creepy-ass dude.
Thankfully that’s not how things are today. I ain’t got time to be slicing off no body parts for inspiration; healthcare what it is and all. Now, writers/bloggers have any number of conferences to choose from, where at each and every one they claim to be able to teach you how to be successful, but not necessarily how to find your tribe. So, what do you do if these conferences don’t work for you? Or, what if you find your tribe, but don’t feel like these group settings are giving you what you need, or what your tribe needs in order to succeed? Well, as the saying goes, if the door won’t open, then build your own door….or something like that. I don’t know, I don’t do inspirational shtick. Read more →
Fear is a natural part of life for most people. Sure, some people have more fears than others; fear of heights, fear of dogs, fear of clowns…because FUCK CLOWNS!! Hell, when you become a parent your fears grow 3 sizes, like they’re the Grinch’s heart or something. But while most of the these fears can be fixed or subsided by realizing that everything is going to be okay, there’s one kind of fear that can literally stop you in your tracks; stunt your growth in a number of areas (personally, professionally, emotionally) – the fear of failure.
As a creative person, I know this fear well; most, if not all creative people do. Being creative is mix wanting to be seen, but afraid of not being good enough. But, what if we didn’t do that? What if we weren’t afraid to put ourselves out there, or be afraid of being judged? What if we just took a leap, and trusted in ourselves? Read more →
Change is hard. Especially when you don’t see a need to change, or when the action that needs to change is associated with having a good time; like drinking. By this point in all our lives, we all know someone, or you are that person, that has a little too much at a party and becomes the life of the party to some, or the annoying drunk to others. When we were young it was easy to laugh off these kinds of actions as someone just cutting loose. But now, as we’re older and supposedly more mature, these are the kind of action we identify with someone who needs help.
But what if there was another in that scenario who also needed help? A person who doesn’t get out of control or make a scene? A person who can keep it together and handle their alcohol, but unbeknownst to you, they using that alcohol to cope with life? How do we spot them? Well, just short of that person saying they need help, we can’t. Read more →
I don’t actually how to start this story. How do I tell the story of someone I admire, but also a person I know little to nothing about them? Will I be able to write that story? Will people even believe me, or with they think I’m just making it up or trying to fill space? Will anyone even read that story?
Sure, those are all things I could, and maybe still do, worry about, but the real question I have is, will I be able to do this story justice with what little I factually know? Will I be able to tell this person’s story to the level that they deserve? Will they even read it? I guess there’s only one way to find out. Read more →